I feel like a new women

Hello World.

This running and getting healthy has been such a blessing to my life. I have a renewed sense of self worth. I can do something that I thought I never could. On Saturday I ran for 3 minutes straight TWICE. To many, this may seem like no big deal. To ME this was such an accomplishment. I get to do it again tonight, and I am excited about it!

With this getting healthy kick, I am noticing that I am not really craving the "sweets" as much. I still have the odd craving for "Ketchup chips". I think I may have fallen into temptation on this twice in the last 3 weeks. I will overcome and learn to have a little "self control". I just LOVE those chips, I can't help it.

Yesterday was the ladies "cookie exchange" that my friend Mary and I organized. I think it was a great success. We had over 30 people at our exchange. Massive amounts of cookies. It was wonderful. I have a vision of all the generations of ladies coming together in unity, and working together for Christ. We as women are known (no offense) to be "complainers, grumblers, stuck in our ways". BUT if we can walk with Christ, do his work, stop our pigheadedness, we WILL accomplish GREAT things.

Last night there were at least 7 generations of women/little women at the cookie exchange. It made me emotional and excited to see what God has in store for us. It was exciting to see some of our youth girls just helping out. These girls never grew up in church, but they were excited to be there and willing to help. It BLESSED me beyond words. It takes a "community" and I believe that our "community" is BEAUTIFUL and wonderful.. I look forward to the next few months of planning to see what's next for all of us

In regards to the cookie exchange. I hardly had any "sample" cookies. Which is AMAZING, since I LOVE sweets!!!

Well, God is good and faithful. Thanks for reading my blog. You make me smile everyday.

Ps- I lost 3lbs in the month of November. Larry even thinks I'm starting to "tone up" a little. :) Yippee to that.

Be blessed

Love
Heidi

Doing the run.. But running this race can be harder then I thought

Hello World

I am about to Rant tonight.. Let me say before I rant. This is directed at nobody, this is something that is stirring up in my heart, and I feel that I must blog about it.

I've been sharing with you my journey from couch to 5K. It's going so well and I am so thankful that I am healthy enough to try and train for a 5KM run. I am also running a race with my generation and for the younger generations of this community and Nation. My heart yearns to see the schools in our town/country and their students find the "truth" and hunger for more of God. I am on my knees for my generation. One thing that I am praying for and struggling with is a generation who has a huge distaste for commitment and lack of trust.

What is wrong with committing to something? Why do we find it so difficult to do so. I can see a pattern in our youth today because of our generation and the past generation failing to commit. Where is the consistency that needs to be? What have we done?

Why are we so afraid to commit?

I know for a fact that I too have a huge issue with commitment as well. We started Mikayla out in Soccer a few years ago. However, we barely made it to many of her games, because we had so much other stuff on our plate. Then we put the kids in Gymnastics last fall. We only missed a few nights but ended up not returning for the winter session, as it was just too much. Too much from what?? I don't get ourselves. Yes our schedule is pretty hectic with BG clubs on Wednesdays, small group on Thursdays and Piano and youth on Fridays. However, why am I so wishy-washy when it comes to certain things.

I know that our generation struggles with this and I just can't understand why? (I'm sorry if I step on toes today, this is not directed at a single person, it's just an observation that I've made in the past 7 years).

We need to be an example to the younger generations. I think it's time that we "rise up" and take a stand. Show them what it is to be committed and live in integrity. I want to be this person, I want my babies to know that their mother keeps her word. I see future leaders that struggle with committing 1 day a week to serve, I see parents struggle sending their children to hockey, soccer, youth, or special events that their children want to take part in, because they just don't feel like it. I'm there, I know what a hard day is like, however we need to teach the next generation what true priorities are.

You may be thinking "Wow, Heidi's had a rough day". Not so.. I'm just concerned for the future of my children and our "youth" of our nation. God has such a plan and I don't ever want to cause anyone to stumble, including my 3 beauties. I hope this "rant" makes sense. I just want to do what's right.

My husband has been in full time youth ministry for almost 6+ years now. It's by far a tough job, but so rewarding. To see future leaders have a passion for change, to see future leaders HUNGRY for more. I just pray that we can ALL be a good example, watch them grow and fall deeply in Love with Christ.

THAT brings me to another thing. If we TRULY loved Christ, would we not walk around with a Smile on our faces? Would we not Love our neighbors as our self. Wouldn't we be selfless? When we hear that it's time for a prayer night, wouldn't we be excited to go to it, instead of staying at home. Now, in all honesty when a prayer night happens, I usually stay at home with the kiddo's, BUT I am praying, just at home. However, a lot of the times when we hear "prayer night" we roll our eyes and don't step foot in the door. HOW are we going to change the world if we stop praying? If we truly loved Christ wouldn't we BE THERE excited and passionate about prayer? If we truly Loved Christ wouldn't we get off Facebook or shut the TV off and open our bibles?? Hey, I'm talking to myself here, I want to hear from God SOOOOOO bad, but yet can't get off the computer to "listen" and "read his word". Funny isn't it? I want to stop thinking about "ME ME ME" all time. I'm so sick and tired of having "pity parties" for myself and I'm beyond frustrated about how Christianity is perceived by our culture. It's time we move forward, it's time for a change. Today is the day we walk away from our legalism and start doing what Christ has commanded us to do. John 15:13: "This is my commandment love one another a I have loved you" This is it. We should be concerned for others, love others and stop worrying about ourselves. THEY (people) will know Christ by OUR LOVE>>> Are we loving people today?

Let's be serious, We can act like a Christian, it's so easy to "fake it". God wants MORE, he wants more from you and he wants more from me. Who's with me? If we stand up today and say "Time for a change" THINK at what God can do?? It's exciting, thrilling and amazing!!

O.k long rant is over.

Can I just say that I am so thankful for the church that God has placed Larry and I in. Beautiful people, beautiful family of God. I am truly blessed and they are truly family. Seeing Preston growing up with some buddies and a young girl all together, is really cool. Watching Mikayla grow up with the encouragement to be an encourager. INCREDIBLE. People loving on Bennet is wonderful. Someday my babies will CHANGE this World for Jesus. Bethel will have a HUGE role in their lives. We are BLESSED.

Tomorrow Mikayla is hanging out with Courtney, my running buddy and Mikayla's BG club leader. I am so excited to see my daughter build a relationship with such a role model. It's pretty cool to see :)

Thank you all for reading. I hope this doesn't sound negative. I feel VERY passionate about what is stirring in my heart. It's time I shared it with the World.

Love the Lord with all your heart!

Heidi

God is Good. I just want to do

Week 2 Day 1 Complete

I am enjoying the Couch to 5 K program very much. It's very difficult but I'm really really enjoying it.

Yesterday was a struggle to get out and run. However Courtney arrived and out I went. I was very nervous about the jogging for 90 seconds but I could do it! 90 seconds doesn't sound like a lot, but for someone who hasn't ran in years, 90 seconds can feel like 24 hours.

Courtney and I DID it we completed Week 2 Day 1 and I am honestly very proud. I am hoping that we will continue to do this and get VERY healthy!!!

I am gaining weight though. But I'm hoping that it's just "muscle" gain. I'm trying my best with the exercise and eating, so I'm going to count this as what I previously said.

Well I don't have much to say again- which is amazing..

Everyone keep going, do what you need to do. You can do it!!

Heidi

Restarted and excited

Hey there everyone

After a week break from any exercise due to an injured toe, I have restarted my exercise routine. I have started Couch to 5K again, with a runny buddy. My friend Courtney has joined me on this journey and she's a GREAT encourager and wonderful running buddy.

Mikayla and Courtney ran with me yesterday. It was fun and the time FLEW by!! I look forward to watching Courtney and I run to the 5K.

I am excited to see what I can do..

Larry and I have started our new business too. We do our first Paid photo shoot on Saturday. Looking forward to it!

This isn't very long, as I'm just touching base.

Thanks again for your encouragement, I couldn't do this with out you.

Heidi

Finally Moving and now I'm loosing

Hey World

Zumba was FANTASTIC! It is very hard to follow, but I am going in with the attitude to have fun and get moving. It's dancing, it's salsa, it's MAJOR sweating and the heart is beating. I love it and am hoping to go back next week.

I have started the couch to 5K. Like I said, the first day I couldn't complete it. HOWEVER>>> Yesterday I completed the whole run. I was getting ready to go out and do this, when Mikayla asked if she could come. At first I thought, "It's probably too much for her" BUT REALLY it isn't, so I agreed. Such a special moment. She was hilarious, cheering me on when she knew I felt like quitting. Reminding how GOOD this was for her and I. "Mom this is so important to keeping us healthy" What a girl. I really thank God for her. She NEVER stops moving. She's a GREAT running buddy. I seriously am looking forward to doing our runs together. A great Mother/daughter moment.

Today I've already had a 30 minute work out on Wii Fit plus. SERIOUSLY!! There is this "skateboarding" game. My heart is pumping, and sweat is coming. I love it. It's tons of fun too

I weighed my self this morning. I am down 2.2lbs. Whoo-hoo.. It has begun again. I'm almost out of the 230's! 21lbs to go and I get my week-end away with my hubby!!!

If I can do this... ANYONE CAN!!

Thanks again for reading. Look forward to posting again real soon


Heidi Kozlof

Try something new today

Hey Everyone

Well I did my first couch to 5k yesterday. It was a struggle, I was running in the rain, hoping that would make me feel a little better. I start off on a walk, my warm up, the the lady in my ipod says "RUN NOW". I'm off, I'm feeling good, I'm running I'm running and then I start to feel my breathing start to get heavy. "I think I can I think I can" is running in my mind. 60 seconds is up "Walk now" the lady in my ear says. "This isn't too bad" I think to myself. Then by the 4th run time, I was starting to doubt myself. I kept going.. Gotta do this, Gotta do this. I did 2 more runs, then walks and I seriously couldn't do it. I decided to head back home and do the run as the girl in my ear YELLED for me to do. I got home and was exasperated and a little sad that I didn't complete the whole "Week 1 Day 1" routine. My Loving husband reminded me that I should start slow. I won't move on to day 2 until I complete day 1. Which I am doing tomorrow. When I looked at my ipod I only had 1 more run to do, then walk, then cool down.. I was ALMOST THERE!!! I know Tomorrow I will push myself just a little.

Today I checked my blood pressure and I seem to be back to normal. I am thinking that I was just a little stressed that morning and had a coffee a few hours before I went to see the Doc. I've actually had a lot of fun today. Larry's day off, so I went on the Wii fit for an hour. There is this skateboarding activity that is a great work out. Tons of fun too.

Tonight I'm trying Zumba with a few girls. I will see what I think tonight, it's my free night. If I enjoy it, I may join. It's Monday evenings at 530. My girlfriend says it's a blast. I am wanting to try anything that will get me moving!!!

My new goal for this week is to drink my 8 glasses of water. I really stink at that. I am also working on a meal plan, so that we don't just "eat out" and eat "junk". I'm excited about this "journey" again.

I weighed myself and was back to 233lbs. IF I can hit 199lb my Mom is willing to send Larry and I away for a week-end. She's giving me some incentive to keep up the great work. I love it, Bribing me!! It works for Mikayla, it works for me. LOL . I also have another incentive of $1.00/lb. Right now I'm and $0.00 so that's just not going to stick with me.

Zumba tonight, running tomorrow (morning if possible)

Something else that I am working on is my devotional life. I think that is the MOST important part of my whole journey, is spending time chatting with God. I think if I can get THAT in order, I can also get ME in order too.

Thanks for reading. I really appreciate all the facebook messages and "comments" from you. It really does encourage me to know that I have "cheerleaders". I too am cheering all of you on, who also wants to get your health back. I believe that my body is the temple of Christ. It's time that I start treating it with respect and love.

Enjoy your day. I'll let you know how Zumba goes tonight.

Love and Joy

Heidi

My eyes were opened

Hello world.

My journey began April/Mayish. My weight is practically the same. I haven't really been trying and I have been just plain lazy.

On Friday I went to the doctors to get my ear looked at. IT's been plugged for over 3 weeks, and I was getting very frustrated and I just felt plain ill. When they took my blood pressure, it was high. I keep thinking, "It must have been my coffee" or "I have been stressed with all the illness in my home". These excuses are probably the reason, but even still I really do need to get my butt in gear and get moving. What if I actually do have high blood pressure?? AT 30!!! The only person to blame here, is ME!!

When I started this "Get healthy" walk, I had said I want to do a 5km run in May. I am still there. I still want to do the Where is Frankville? run. However, at this point I am NO WHERE near that goal.

Many of my friends have suggested couch to 5km. I tried it once, and it was tough. Last night I was thinking about this 5K run, and really really really want to do this. For my birthday my hubby was kind and gave me an ipod touch. I went on to the app site and there it was. An application for this. My ipod will be my "coach".

My girlfriend has started the program, and is doing AMAZING. Yesterday she ran 20 minutes without stopping. I am so proud of her, and she has inspired me to DO THIS! She told me that it's HARD.. But if you keep at it.. You CAN DO IT!! I go with that. Keep at it and DO IT!!!

Today after church I am going to do my first run. I am just a tad frightened at the thought of breathing REALLY HARD. With that being said, "I can do this, I must do this (for myself and my family) and I look forward to going to my first run someday soon.

Thank you for all of you that support me. I do appreciate your love

Sincerely

Heidi

Humble Pie

My husband surprised me tonight with a birthday party. He had sent out invitations last Sunday, before my birthday. How do I feel?? Embarrassed, silly, humble and blessed.

What have I learned about myself this week?? That I can be totally honest, and even "selfish" but yet I have friends that don't look different at me and Love me for who I am.

Larry had me so convinced that I'd be having a nice evening with a couple tonight, that I was so confused when people started arriving after they had. My jaw dropped and I told Larry he was "bad". LOL But inside I was excited and still a little "shameful" about my horrible attitude on Monday.

I just want to thank Larry for his sneaky ways. I want to thank EVERYONE for making me feel special. Tonight is a night that I will not forget.

This is a short little note to say that I am eating some humble pie tonight. :)

Life is great!

Heidi

I learned something today. Not an uplifting blog but a deep in thought blog

O.k before I start the brutally honest blog. This isn't to make anyone feel bad. This blog is about something I learned about myself yesterday that I am almost ashamed of, but need to put it out there. I am sure I'm not the only person that struggles with this.

Yesterday was my 30th birthday. I don't know what I had expected, I know that birthdays are just another day, but for some reason I was thinking that THIS one was going to be a very SPECIAL day, that everyone in this World (o.k not the whole world) would celebrate MY 30th birthday. How narcissistic is THAT!! I honestly don't know what I wanted, but I felt WAY too emotional yesterday to understand what was going on with me.

As I reflect on my feelings of yesterday I realize how selfish I can be. I wanted a party, with all my friends, food, cake, cards, all that jazz. However, my birthday was on Thanksgiving and everyone was busy with their families.(which they should be doing) How old am I?? I'm not a child anymore, why did I want this???

I did have my family here for the week-end, they celebrated with me, spoiled me with a basket of groceries (love that) and my sister gave me a wonderful Joyce Meyers book that I'm looking forward to reading. My friends also had us over for lunch and made me a YUMMY chocolate birthday cake. I had over 100 Facebook birthday wishes. But why wasn't that enough??? What is my problem? Why did I want a party so bad? We are trying to teach Mikayla to not be greedy, and here I am struggling with greediness and selfishness too!

I have heard through the grapevine that some of my friends and family think that I like to be the center of attention, maybe that is it? I never thought I was like that, until yesterday. I wanted a silly party to Celebrate Me, that almost makes me sick to my stomach to think that I am like that. Then my question is WHY do I crave attention? I don't want to be like that at all. I just want to live for Jesus', be unselfish, help others, and do God's will. With that being said, "Why do I struggle with selfishness?" I have a dislike for this "weakness" of mine.

Larry knew that something was bothering me yesterday. When he'd ask all I could say was "It must be PMS". (Too much information, I apologize) I didn't want him to feel bad about the way I was feeling. It wasn't his fault, this was something that I had to deal with. He is so great though, because he kept at me, until I confessed what I was struggling with.

It's really funny, because on Sunday Larry preached about "baggage" we all may have. I am biased, but I think it was one of his BEST sermons yet. One of the baggage was "EGO". That we need to bring this to the CROSS, and ask Jesus' to help take this away. He will put it "under that cross". Is this my baggage? Do I think I DESERVE everything?? I have decided that I need to bring my self worth, and my selfishness to the cross, leave it there and walk away.

Do I want a party? Not really, especially now, since I just laid everything out on the table. Messy isn't it? It just saddens me that after knowing what Jesus has done for me, the most UNSELFISH thing a man could do, that I still struggle with ME ME ME.

I am so thankful for my family, for Larry and the kiddo's. Having them with me all day yesterday was such a gift. The best gift in the World! I really did have a wonderful day, a great 30th birthday. A highlight was playing Mario Kart with Bennet. I looked at him and said "You're going down" He looked at me and said "NO I AM NOT" and then he kicked my butt in the race. Hugged me and said "you went down, but I Love you Mommy". What a treasure, what a life that I have. God has blessed me with so much. I am truly thankful and wouldn't want it any other way.

I am learning so much about myself and am thankful that I can sense the "garbage" that goes on within me. I am sharing this today to say. "We can have those selfish moments, but don't let them control who you are"

Party or not- I am loved, I am blessed and am thankful for my life.

Heidi

Another Year.. I will begin again

Hello All. Hope you are all doing well. Today is a day that I have been dreading for the last 5 years. Today I turn 30. I should be excited because it means I'm getting older. The thought that I'm not a 20's something has me a little sad. I know, it's not all that bad. Many people have told me that 30's are fantastic. With that being said, I will not dread today, but enjoy it and take one day at a time.

Today is also Thanksgiving. Tons to be thankful for. My wonderful family, 3 beautiful babies, and shelter to cover our heads. I am Thankful to be a Canadian, and would not want to live anywhere else. I am Thankful for our church family, thankful for our friends, thankful for what our Lord has done for us.

During Thanksgiving there is Lots of yummy food and dessert. I will tell you that I ate everything and enjoyed it too. I'm still off the wagon. BUT I have an incentive from an a person that shall remain nameless. For every pound I lose she/he will give me a $1.00. Since I have decided to stay at home with Preston I am thinking this could be a great way for me to make some money and get healthy. I agreed to the challenge.
Then if I hit my goal of 175lbs (for now) she/he will give me a substantial cash prize. I couldn't say NO. PLUS.. you my readers have encouraged me to continue.

Today is my birthday and the start of this journey YET AGAIN!!

My health is so important to me that I MUST continue. I want to be a good example to my babies and the girls that we work with.

Thanks again for your support. You should be seeing a few more of this entries as the weeks progress

Thought of the day- Age means nothing. Live life every day with passion and excitement

To the wonderful women who taught me what serving is all about

We moved into our new little Green and white house with our baby girl Mikayla, about to embark on our first place of ministry. Excited, eager, nervous and very frightened. We didn't know very many people in our new little community, but we received an invitation for dinner to the Mulders. Koop, Janny & Henrietta welcoming us to the community with a wonderful dinner. Janny making us feel so wonderful. We were beyond content and excited about our new beginnings.

Watching Janny serve our church was a lesson learned, without her even noticing. That Basement kitchen was hers and everyone knew it. She served in MANY of the ministries, and her legacy was also serving. Watching the Love she had for her grand babies was an amazing moment in my life. She was so proud of them. She loved them and taught me that Family really is important.

Jesus was her life. She never once back down from that!

Watching her daughters share the last few weeks over facebook has been a challenge but a blessing too. With that being said, Janny wanting a picture of her "en suite" from the hospital showed me that there is a Peace in Janny that only Jesus' can give.

I am picturing Janny dancing and breathing LONG Deep life giving breaths with our Lord. She was a faithful servant and I know that God was proud.

Thank you Janny for teaching me what's really important in life. You may have just been You, but to me you were a teacher a friend an adoptive "Oma". We feel honored and blessed to have had you in our lives. You have left a legacy that I someday hope that I will leave to.

It's not good bye today. It is I will see you again

Heidi

My weight issues are NOTHING compared to other things

Life is but a mist. All my worrying about if I'm 50lbs lighter is nothing compared to what my dear friend is going through today. Yes I want to be healthy, and I'm going to be. Yes in my journey I will lose the weight needed, I WILL.

However Life is here one day and gone the next. Is this fretting and frustration really worth it all? I don't think so.

My girlfriend became a widow and a single mother today, and I am just heartbroken for her. He was one of those guys that you just couldn't forget, I remember when they started dating. I can't believe he's gone. They were just beginning their lives together. I don't get it.. I don't understand. What I am thankful for is that I have a God in times like this. I don't know how anyone can handle such tragedy without. I know that God will be with her and take care of her. I know that she knows who God is. I just have no answers as to WHY and it leaves me to think and ponder on what is really important.

Jesus... Family...Everything else comes after.

God you know pain.. Give a peace that passes all understanding..

Thank you for being there always

Be blessed

Heidi

A little business on my Blog.. But I really want to make everyone aware

I am writing this note to everyone one I know to announce something I’m really excited about… a new Fall and Winter season is about to begin with The Pampered Chef… and I just can’t wait to share all the new products and recipes with you.

I’m sure most of you are familiar with The Pampered Chef….but if you are not check out their website (and products) at www.pamperedchef.biz/heidikozlof The products are fantastic…..and the shows are so much fun….!

My business grows by word of mouth… and I have been having so much fun at my shows… I can’t wait to offer you the opportunity to share an awesome evening of food and fun with your friends!! I would like to introduce you to all that is new this fall, and there are three ways that you can be a part of my business this fall….

1. Having some friends over for a fun, hands on cooking show: I would feel so comfortable doing a cooking show with you….….and I’d love to treat you to some great free product and massive discounts. Having a show is super easy and fun….and you get tons of great rewards for hosting. I can explain more how it works when we chat.

OR if you have no interest in that……you could…

2. ATTEND a very special VIP EVENT: I’ll be organizing a few fall launch parties very soon…..and I would love it if you came and just saw what I was doing…….Bringing a friend would be a great help too. We will have some drinks….make a great recipe together so you can see the tools in action and eat…..(and shop too if you like)

OR if you have no interest in that…..you could….

3. Place an order anytime or just tell people you know that your friend is a Pampered Chef consultant (in case they are interested in hosting/attending etc). Word of mouth is so helpful…..I could give you a catalogue to just share with people.

OR I can’t help but wonder if you might like to earn some extra income this fall and have a debt-free Christmas?
4. I have really loved my new business with The Pampered Chef and am so impressed by all that this business can offer… more income… more fun… more social time… all on your own flexible schedule. I have met so many people who are all so different - and who all do Pampered Chef for different reasons. If you would be curious to learn more about what I am doing, I would love to share more information with you to see if it might be something that would fit in your life, or not.

I will be giving you a call soon to chat about this and find out what your interest level is…… NO pressure REALLY…..I just wanted to make sure I informed EVERYONE I know about all the awesome new things happening with my Pampered Chef business this fall …and I wanted to give everyone the opportunity to participate in one way or another……..

Back sliding party

Okay.. You probably have all guessed, I haven't been really on the bandwagon with the "healthy eating" and get my butt moving.

I've come to the conclusion I absolutely despise physical activity. I know this sounds so lazy, and it probably is. The fact that Preston isn't sleeping very well, has made me very tired and no desire to get up and walk. I wish I had the desire to walk everyday or work out on the WII or even doing my work out videos. I can "blame" it on lack of sleep, but lets be realistic, I haven't got myself in the situation I'm in JUST because I'm sleepy. NO.. I've hated excersize for years and I LOVE fatty foods

Where do I start?? How do I overcome this lack of desire?? How do I change my lifestyle that I OH so Love?? Where do I begin?

These are questions that I'm going to have to figure out in the next few months. Does this mean I give up?? Absolutely not. My family is so important to me. I want to be around for a very long time. I want to see all 3 babies grow up to be grown ups. I want to see them get married and have babies of their own. I want to be called Grandma. I want to spoil their babies like my Mom spoils them. I want all of this, so because of this, I MUST change the way I'm living.

Will you continue on this journey with me??

I've gained 5lbs back from what I've lost. Holidays and back sliding is to blame (or myself is to blame).

Thanks for taking the time to support me. I really appreciate you all.

I am excited to announce that I am NOT going back to work in November. Very excited about this and nervous too. Not having the second income will be a challenge I'm sure.

Larry and I have started really working on our photography. We by no means are like his sister, who is amazing and if you live in Chatham, really need to check her out and get your pictures done through BJ & Melanie. However we really do enjoy taking "family shots" and "nature" pictures. I hope someday to be able to start up a little "family" business on the side of doing ministry.


Anyways, I'll keep you all informed with my progress. I have decided that I'm a terrible blogger, even though I enjoy blogging.. So funny!!

Be blessed everyone. YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Love
Heidi

Wowzers!

Hello World.

Well I decided today that I would face the scale and see how I'm doing. Honestly, still not completely "on the wagon" BUT I have noticed that I'm not eating as much as I used too. Also combined with my illness...

I WAS DOWN 4.5 pounds.. I am shocked and excited. Great way to get "back on the wagon".

I am starting new and feel completely excited about the start. I was 226lbs. I believe that that means I've lost 9lbs since I've started this journey. I think my 4.5 lb weight loss is PURE LUCK though. However.. I'll take it!!!

My 2 older babies are now 5 & 7. It's hard to believe. They have taken off for their annual visit with Grandma. I was hoping that Preston would be able to go. But he's still pretty stuck to his Mommy's hip. I am totally okay with it!! I hope for my parents sake that Preston will soon be able to go for visits with them. I think Mikayla and Bennet are happy to get away from their baby brother too. They LOVE him, but he is pretty demanding of our time.

Anyways, I should go. Larry and I are going to the city today with Preston. It's a little easier to get out and go when the older kiddo's are away!

Thank you all for following me. I'm so proud of many of your journey's too.

God bless
Heidi

I haven't forgotten :(

Hello to all my followers. Thank you for believing in me. I know that I can do this journey. I will be completely honest.. I have had a set back or shall I say fallen off the wagon. No excuses, just bad choices. I have been busy with camps and we've had many sickness in our homes. I've been almost too embarrassed to write, because I know that you are routing for me and I feel like I'm letting you down. BUT I know that this is not the truth, and that you guys are my cheer leaders and I TOTALLY am blessed to have you in my life.

Life at the Kozlof's has been interesting in the last month. We had our Full week of Kids Kamp last week. My hubby did a great job at leading it, he sure makes me proud. I got the chance to lead the kiddo's in Worship EVERY day, it was a blast. We had this one little guy who did "air guitar" the whole time we sang our songs. It was hard not to crack up laughing, but really cool to see. Our goal was to reach 40 kids and our first day we had 60 youngsters ready to learn about Jesus. It was a powerful week. WE can't wait to see what God has in store for us next year. At the end of today our 2nd week of camp is coming to an end. Pastor Paul is running a Sport's camp and Larry has been assisting and Mikayla attending. She's been enjoying herself completely. Today is "Baseball" day, that Larry is leading. I'm sure they'll be exhausted. We are really blessed that God has placed us here. It's very exciting.

We have had much sickness in our home. It started at the end of school and seems to creep it's way back into our home. Now it's my turn and I'm REALLY feeling ill and "down". I REALLY want to eat better and get moving, but the way I've been feeling the last few weeks, makes me want to STAY in bed. No moving = No loosing. I'm determined, but in all honesty I'm afraid that I'm going to fail. I try to be positive, however I can hear the negativity spinning in my ears. I know that THAT is not of God.. I know that ALL things are possible. I know that I am wonderfully made. SO THERE to negativity.

Summer has started and the heat is ON!! Our neighbour has kindly given us the keys to her pool. We are soooooo thankful for her. The kids LOVE swimming. Mikayla and Bennet's birthdays are next week-end and I'm totally not prepared at all. Hopefully I'll get my butt in gear. Being sick hasn't help the matter.

Anyways- I'm off for now. I really do hope to stay in touch a lot better then I have.

Heidi

July just around the corner

Hello All. So I have to be honest... I am STINKING at this journey. I started strong and now have "slacked" these past few weeks. I really do want to get healthy, I want to get active. I am believing that this summer will bee a good one of activity and movement. I however, have had a very sick young family for the past few weeks and have had to stay home and nurse them. Therefore, I am NOT walking, I am NOT eating well, I am not losing weight.

I AM however determined and I WILL accomplish my goals. I just have to get my butt in gear.

I still have $6.00 for my Diabetes jar and I am hoping for more.

I did some gardening today. However, Larry did more, because the BUGS just GROSS me out. I start, then I see some bug that I've never seen before and I get the heebie jeebies. I guess I really have no Green thumb in me what so ever. It makes me sad, because my father is an incredible gardener and I am a good manager telling Larry what to do.. :) Our front gardens are looking wonderful, but our back yard is a MESS. We have to finish the last garden and then put down some grass seed. Here's hoping that after our camps we will get it done.

Well it's not a long post as Mikayla has just come home from school. Tomorrow is the last day of school for both kiddo's. Hard to believe that Mikayla is going to be 7 and Bennet 5. The years go by so so so FAST!!!

Blessings to you

Heidi

Doing well.. Celebrating my Babies Daddy!

Hello World..

I've had a great few days. Went away last week-end and I think I made some pretty good food choices. I didn't walk away going "ARGH"! Lots of salads, protein, and WATER.

It's interesting at how the Devil can effect me in my battle of self confidence. We were away for a time to "re-fuel" with many other Pastors and their family. Low and behold I was looking at all the BEAUTIFUL Pastor's wives, thinking to myself. "I don't look like them." However, God spoke clearly "You are my child, I made you, you are beautiful and wonderful" I struggled with HEARING what God was saying, however I am thankful to walk in this journey with God and myself.

SInce I've been home I have endured yet another illness. I am battling a "cold" like I never had before. It knocked me OUT. I haven't been active this week, so I am not even stepping near a scale. I'll wait until tomorrow. Start over again. I really do hope that I can get feeling better soon!!! Funny how when you start to do something GOOD for yourself spiritually, and physically- you come down with some sickness. I WILL NOT be stopped.

Today is Fathers Day. I am blessed to still have my Dad around. He's a great man. He may not always be "emotional" with me, but I know he dedicated his life to providing for his family. He's a hard worker, has worked in construction since he was 16. He's now 52 or 53, can't seem to remember, STILL working his butt off. I am thankful for him. He's become a fantastic Grandpa, that my children have fallen DEEPLY in love with. Thank you Dad for being you!!!

Larry, the LOVE of my life. (This may be cheesy, so if your stomach's can't handle it, don't read it.) LARRY- You are fantastic, amazing, generous, and oh so loving. Your babies are so blessed to have you. We have been through much in our 10 years together, but I will shout it out to the World. "I LOVE YOU WITH ALL THAT I AM". I really do respect you, even at times when I may not sound like it.. I really do. I feel so honored that God chose YOU to be in my life. Thank you for choosing me to be your wife. Thank you for being a diaper changer. Thank you for cleaning up boogers. Thank you for handling our children's Vomit, as I absolutely STINK when it comes to that. You wake up with our school aged babies and get them ready for the day, as Preston and I are catching up on the sleep we didn't get during the night. You never complain about it. I can tell that you Love your family, and I want you to know that WE the Kozlof Family APPRECIATE YOU!!! Thanks for being a Great man of God and an awesome role model to our children. You my dear- KICK BUTT.. And that is that!!!

I'll keep you all updated to my progress. It's been a challenge at this point as I love food!!

Thanks all.

Thought of the day- Some of you may not have a great relationship with your earthly fathers.. BUT your heavenly father LOVEs you. "He knows your name, He knows your every thought He sees each tear that falls and hears you when you call"

Get up Get up and Move

Hello World

Things are still at the 230lb mark. I've lost and now maintained. I am REALLY wanting to get moving more and hope to see this weight go. I am however struggling with "energy and motivation" All I want to do is stay in my Pj's and watch TV. I think that's my problem. I honestly believe that I have a "Spirit of laziness", which is probably the main reason I've gained the weight.

I can't afford to join the gym or classes, so walking and WII fit seems to be the only thing at this time. I just can't seem to get the weight to keep going down.. Yes a little discouraged but yet I'm still confident that in a year from now, I'm going to be healthy and look my best.

We are heading to a Young Pastors Time out tomorrow evening. I'm looking forward to this. Worship, the word, and family time. I am praying that I will get the chance to listen to God. Preston will still be with me, so sometimes it can be difficult to LISTEN. However I am expecting GREAT things for this time away!!

$6.00 is in my jar and I hope to add more REAL soon.

Be blessed my friends

Heidi

I did it!!!

I'm back on track. I weighed myself yesterday and was back up to 233lbs. I was actually relieved because I was scared that I would be up 5lbs so 1.8lbs was okay. I'm back down today at 230. So I'm excited and ready to go.

I tried "running" yesterday, and it didn't go so great. However, if I want to get off the couch and do my 5Km run in 11 months, I need to start training TODAY> I will try again this evening and see how it goes. I was wearing my I-pod trying to listen to worship music, while I push myself PAST my comfort. The problem... The earphones kept falling out of my ears. And my loss of breath was humiliating. My solution to this silly problem, well the earphone one, is I'm going to find Mikayla's Camp Rock earphones, they have the headband on them. THEN that should stay on my head!! The breathing problem, well that will come.

I am putting $6.00 in my Diabetes Jar today. Since I was soooo close to 3lb loss.
I think I may even decorate my jar. Pictures to post later!!!

I'm going out for lunch in about 20 minutes with my dear friend for her birthday. I'm planning on "healthy" choices and LOTS of water.

I am so thankful for you all reading this. Their are many of you out there doing this journey with me. KEEP it up!! You can do this. Veggies, fruit and wALKING!! 3 bite rule (which I struggle with).

Have a great day.


Heidi

MIKAYLA'S BLOG - WRITTAN BY MIKAYLA

To the World

Today was a good day because yesterday we moved our toy room to the old TV room. We played 3 to 4 times today. Bennet got Daddy to call him monkey, so then Daddy tickled him and I joined in to the fun. Then Mommy even joined in. It was FUN! When we were playing Mom stepped on my knee. I was okay in the end. Mommy is a silly tickle monster. I wouldn't do anything without her.

The food I had today was Toaster Waffles for Breakfast, Grilled Cheese for lunch, and my favorite meal PEORGIES!! We had "ice cream" for our dessert/night night snack.
Everything thing today was good, except when I got in trouble twice for throwing things when I got angry!!! But I'm not going to do that anymore.

It's time to go. Hope you comment on this.

Love

Mikayla

Thank God there is a Tomorrow

Well I have to admit, I have fallen off the wagon. I haven't checked my weight because of fear. I will check tomorrow. I've eaten everything in site and every "craving" I've had I have overindulged. I am confessing to you, and hope you aren't disappointed in me. I am in myself, but yet feel pushed to do better.

I noticed that my friend is doing a 3 month challenge and for every pound she loses she donates a toonie to her local food bank. I have decided that I too am going to do a challenge of such. For every pound I lose I too will donate $2.00 to the diabetes association. My husband has type 1 since he was six and I know many others that have it. I am actually very fearful that I'm headed in this direction too. I am excited about this and look forward to giving them a hefty donation :)

On a side note, Bennet was "observed" on Friday but "behaved" no melt downs. So I'm not sure what the outcome of this will be.

Preston is getting bigger and Mikayla is becoming a little "teenager". :)

Life is always interesting and we all have our moments. I thank God each day for my wonderful family. I can't even imagine where my life would be without him.

I hope you are all doing well. I will weigh myself tomorrow morning. I will blog tomorrow, unless I can't..

Peace be with you

Heidi

Things that make you go......

Couldn't think of a good title today, so thought I'd make you decide how to finish it.

My week has been a pretty good week. Still really struggling with food choices. We had a great day at the beach. By habit, I took chips. I haven't ate chips in almost 6 weeks and I once I started to eat them, the whole "3 bite rule" went out the window. However, I'm here today admitting that I may have ate plenty of Ketchup chips for the next year, but I'm Going to get this healthy thing up to par.

I've done my walking and have enjoyed eating salads. I LOVE salad to the core. However, I'm not seeing the results I'd like to, and in all honesty am feeling a little frustrated. I know that what I put into my mouth is probably the key reason I'm not losing as "fast" as I'd like. Therefore, starting right now... I WILL do my best and do it 100%.

I got a great email message today from a friend that I haven't seen in years. She sent me an encouraging e-mail to remind me that God is my security. I think by now, you probably have all figured out that I am a little "insecure" with my body. I too believe that I'm insecure with plain old ME! My friend has been reading a book by Beth Moore. She told me she's learned TONS from it. I must search for this book and read it myself. One thing that my friend said she learned from Beth Moore was " Insecurity will hold us back from fulfilling the call God has on our lives. He will not force "security" on us and no one else can give it to us. Insecurity is not a weakness...it is a form of unbelief." Boy did that "kick me in the pants" in a good way. Did I not just say that I was struggling with "the call" God has for me?? I do believe that my weight loss journey is not just for weight loss but also for me becoming a secure women of God. He does have a call for me, and I want to be secure enough in me and him, to do his will.

God is my life. Some of you that are reading this may know this or not. My life is for him. My husband and I live each day wanting to do God's will. We've been through up's and down's. We've moved a distance from family feeling "called" to Smiths Falls. I just want to live for him. I also want to see others "live" for him. Some people ask me "Why do you believe in a God that you don't even see". I say this. "I do see God. I see him in the beauty of our Earth, I see him in my children, I see him in my life and I can feel him when I sing" Who would have thought that a "Girl" from Ayton would be working in different communities, teaching and sharing the Love of God. My life proves to me that Yes there is a God. I'm not about debating or arguing until I'm blue in the face about God, that's not me. I don't feel intellectual enough to do so either.. I just want to show God's Love. It's that simple to me. I wish it was for others. I also believe because the day my Grandfather passed, he called my "name", his last words were "Heidi, Heidi, Heidi" and the REASON he called my name is because he had accepted Jesus on his deathbed, and I told him I was jealous that he was going to see my best friend. I told him to call my name when he saw him. HE DID!! not just once but 3 times. I can never ever forget that moment in my life. This story of my Grandfather is a much LONGER one, that I'd love to share with any of you. Maybe I'll blog it some other day.

I guess what I'm saying today is. I will not give up on this journey. I also believe that there is a purpose for me, and I am going to live it out with Confidence, joy and perseverance.

Thanks so much for reading this and encouraging me. I have fallen in love with Blogging. I feel like this is a great way for me to "express" what's really happening in me. I find that I can express myself much better in writing. It's such a pleasure. Until next time.

Be blessed

Heidi


Thought of the day.
John 4:19

In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him. Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us, and sent His Son to be the satisfaction for our sins"

Hot, Hot hot

Hello World.

It's hot outside and my little man is completely beside himself. I wish I could make things better for him, but all I can do is comfort him and show him that I love him.
Then I noticed that I myself am extremely irritable too. I don't understand how we can HATE winter and HATE the heat. This just doesn't make sense to me. God gave us Canadians the 4 seasons. However, I am starting to think we just have Winter and Summer.

With the heat, it is hard to go walking too. I am at this point "out of shape" and find this heat takes my breath away. Good thing I'm not on the "Biggest Loser" show or they'd be "HOLLERING" at me.

I was back down 2lbs so I was very content with that. I am drinking plenty b/c I noticed that my legs were swollen with fluid today. This happens to me when it's hot. More water is needed.

My friend Barb is sending me a "Care package" in the mail that I'm totally excited about. Barb has called it "you are Beautiful Care package". This is for my inner beauty as well as somethings to pamper me by. HOW COOL IS THAT!!!! I can't wait and feel completely blessed! God knows when his children need a "boost" and he used Barb to do this in my life. Thank you Barb. I totally appreciate you!!!

Everyone reading this. Whatever journey you are on. Don't give up. I wont either. I just wish that Ice cream wasn't so good and COLD!! :)

Thanks for reading

THought of the Day

"Matthew 7:12
So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets."

Great Week-end for my God life.. Bad week-end for my body life

Hello World.

It's been a while, therefore you are probably guessing that I haven't been doing so well on this journey. I will get back to this in a moment. I want to share about my week-end and what's on my mind

I went away this week-end to a "youth" conference. It's funny that they are geared towards teenagers, yet I learned soooo much this week-end for myself. I LOVE worship. I feel closet when I'm singing my heart out to God. Some say I have a gift, I say "I just do it for him". I do feel though, that if it is a gift, that I haven't been walking in it for years. I feel that my call to be a mother is my most important "call" at this point. However, if I was completely honest, I struggle with the fact that I'm not taking part in worship the way my mind has a picture of it. I got the privilege of listening and worshiping with a TALENTED, gifted, anointed women of God, "Amanda Falk", WOW God is using her in such amazing ways. Her music is incredible and you can sense the spirit God all around her. I told Larry that I was almost envious, which is a total SIN that I have struggled with my entire life. Not envious of her voice, but envious of the fact that she's doing what I would LOVE to do with my life. Getting travel to sing and bring others into the presence of God. That is a dream of mine. Maybe someday that will be me, but I don't know how to even begin. I would LOVE to make a CD, I would LOVE to write more music. I would love to be asked to sing at conferences and lead others in worship. However, this feeling of "It may be too late" started to seep into my mind. Is that truth or a lie?? I'm not sure. A verse that's going into my mind is "I know the plans I have you for" Therefore I will trust, I will move forward, and see what God has in store. I just know that this desire to do what "Amanda Falk" does, feels impossible when my first call is to be a "MOTHER" of 3 beauties. This is my inner struggle that I've just totally opened myself up to Everyone that is reading this. I will see what will become of my music and my future. God knows and I will have to trust him. I want to make sure that my desire to do this is not of selfishness, but of pure thoughts and mind. I just love God and want my music to inspire others to listen and worship him with everything they've got.

Okay so now that I've shared that. On to my weight journey. It's not been horrible, however after a week-end away of eating out and not really being active. I weighed myself this morning and was horrified that I gained 4lbs. It will come off and I'm not worried about it. Just sad that I haven't been as determined as I was a month ago. Saying this, I am committed to getting back on track. I am committed to getting healthy, so that I may bless my God. I feel like taking care of the body he gave me, is a way to worship and thank him for allowing me on this planet.

I hung out with some teenagers that are absolutely beautiful, yet they don't see it. My heart ached for them. I want to be an example and Love my body, love my outer beauty. However I am having major self confidence issues. I honestly feel attacked by the enemy. When I eat, I feel like others are watching in disgust. How sad is that. I feel sometimes like a hypocrite. Telling my teenagers, that they need to Love themselves inside and out. Yet I can't seem to do it myself. Practicing what you preach is honestly a very HARD thing to do.

I know this post is a little "downer" but this is a great way for me to "release" what's inside. Being a Pastor's wife, I sometimes think I keep a lot inside. Which is sooooo wrong. We are just as human as anyone else. We have our ups and our downs.

I am confident that I'm going to hit my goals. I am confident that I'm going to get healthy. I am confident that God is going to use me in such a "HUGE" way that I can't even imagine. I just want to be a vessel for God's will. I just want to see my friends who don't know Jesus' learn to know him and have relationship with him. Jesus' changed me and I am forever thankful.

I hope that you are all doing well in your walks and journey. Keep going and don't give up. I won't if you won't!

We are heading out this afternoon for a family "hike" and Picnic. I'm looking forward to this "family" time. Thanks for reading my blog. You all inspire me to do better.

Thought of the day "Stop complaining, get off your donkey and do something about it". (that came from my husband.. I just LOVE him)

Be blessed

Heidi

I will NOT Give up!

Hello World..

It's been a few days, but I've been doing okay. Ice cream is my weakness, I must admit. However, I was down another .2lbs I'm at 229, which makes me very happy, out of the 30's. I do admit I haven't been very active this week. Must get my butt in gear!

I am walking tomorrow with my walking buddy. I'm hoping for no rain, good weather. I absolutely LOVE walking. I'm sure it will perk my spirits. I've been having a few "sad" days. Not sure why? Probably "lack of sleep". Our car also has to be "fixed", which means that our "flooring" will not be happening until another time. I was REALLY looking forward to laminate flooring in our living room/hall way. However, things happen and I must move on from my disappointment. Life doesn't always work out the way I want it to. Argh to that.

This week-end we are heading to Oshawa with 11 teenagers and 2 other leaders, to a Youth convention. It will be a blast and I'm looking forward to seeing what God has in store for them. A majority of our teens have NEVER been to something like this before, so it will be interesting. I'm a little nervous since Preston will be joining us. I'm really hoping he'll be in good spirits while we're away. I'm hoping you'll all pray for our group and for Preston, Larry and myself. I just LOVE watching God work. Here's hoping for a great time!!!

For those of you who are on this journey with me. Keep going.. I will too.

Thought of the day is "Go to my last post and see Alanna's comment"

thanks World..

Kozlofhenhoff (why do I use this name, you all know it's me)

Motivation needed

Hello World,

I have to admit that this week, hasn't been a great week of eating. I need to come back to the basics of veggies/Fruit. We went to Ottawa yesterday, and I was proud. I had a "Salad" at subway. Much better choice then fast food. However, I haven't had the chance to "walk" or do steps, so I'm feeling a little "frumpy" this morning.

Mikayla is still not 100% yet, so it's made life a little stressful. She's very sore and whiny. I don't blame her though, I too would be the same if I had a sore neck. Such a tender spot. She's such a Gem, even though she's feeling "yucky" she's still in her room SINGING her heart out. What a girl!!!!

I think I'm having writers block, because I honestly don't have much to write about today. I'll keep you informed with how things are.

Signing off

Kozlofhenhoff

Not Proud but will continue on

Hello All.

My Journey has hit it's first and hopefully last "binge". It started on Wednesday, when I was waiting to hear about Mikayla and her ER Visit. I was starting to feel a little stressed and went to the food cupboard. I think I found whatever I could and put it in my mouth. :( I ate a lot on Wednesday and haven't weighed myself since. I'm not "giving up" on this journey, I just had a BAD day.

Yesterday I went for an hour walk and it felt great. Great to walk with a friend, chat about life and move forward. I did go to Pizza Hut with this friend afterwards for lunch. I tried to eat a LOT of salad and a few pieces of pizza. Probably not the most healthy thing to do, but the fellowship was much needed and loved.

Today I am going to have to take some time and do some "steps" because I won't have any time to walk or do any exercise for the rest of the week.

The battle of the buldge is a lot harder then I think I first thought. However, it took 8 years to put this on. It's going to take some time.

Signing off for now.

Thought of the day "patience is a virtue"

Kozlofhenhoff

I need to Practice what I preach

My journey is going well. I'm down another .2 (which is nothing but still its down) I'm eating less and moving more. I'm very excited about my process. I'm loving the feeling of success, but know that I will have my days of "toughness" (is that a word?)

I'm still not feeling very well and Larry's cold is a lot worse then mine. I gave him a hard time last night. I find that whenever I'm sick, he's worse off. Therefore, I can't complain ;)

The other day I talked about "worry" and how it's silly to worry. However this morning Mikayla woke up and showed us something on the back of her neck that woke her up. I called the Dr to see what we should do. They suggested bringing her in to the ER. I'm sure it's just a little infection, but it's hard not to worry, when it involves your children. At this moment Larry is hanging out with Mikayla at the ER, waiting to be looked at. I'm at home with the boys. I am wishing I could be there, but at this moment, it's not possible, we didn't want to take all 3 kiddo's to the ER. Somedays it would be so nice to be at 2 places at once. I'm thankful that Larry was able to take her. I'm just sitting waiting for any word. Not exactly my idea of fun.

Well, I will keep you all posted. I'm sure everything will be fine. Poor Mikayla wasn't all that enthused about visiting the Doctors. She is a little nervous about Doctors, Dentists, ect..

Thanks for reading my blog. God is so good to me, to have friends like you. I am blessed

Thought of the day. "Just do it"

Kozlofhenhoff

Vitamin C

Today my hubby and I are "down and out" with a horrible cold. Our heads are achy, our noses full, our sinus hurting and the thought of exercise is just out of the picture :( I haven't gone on WII fit today and don't plan on it either. Today is a day of rest and Vitamin C

Larry's boss is gone for the week. It's crazy that he's fallen ill again. This time however he can work. I find it so ironic, that when the Cat is gone the mouse gets sick.

Preston too has come down with something. He's irritable and very unhappy. He's normally such a happy go lucky baby. Both times that I've come down with a sore throat, he ends up screaming for over an hour. Poor little man. He seems pretty relaxed today, but last night was a "stressful" evening.

I hope that all of you are keeping healthy and in wonderful spirits. Life is so much fun, you never know what the next day will bring.

I honestly don't have much to write today and my head feels a little muffled. I am waiting now for my children to return from school. Hoping for good reports for Bennet.

Signing off.

Thought of the day "Vitamin C" is our friend!

Kozlofhenhoff

Fear is not Fun!!!

Okay. It's taken me a few days. When I did my weigh in on Friday, I was UP and was very frustrated. I didn't want to tell the whole World that I was UP again. So I took a break on weighing myself and worked HARD with my eating and exercise this week-end. I was very reluctant this morning to get on the WII fit. However, I'm determined and and know that I'm on a journey that's not always going to be "good news". I went on and was just under 230lbs. I was over joyed, such a good feeling to know that I'm down 6lbs since I started this journey- 4lbs to go to hit 10lbs. Very very happy!! I must not be discouraged but keep going. 29lbs to go before I get my outfit from my Mom. I CAN do this. To my followers who are on this journey with me, KEEP going!! Don't give up. I won't if you won't!

My Mother's Day was fantastic. My little school aged children brought me home gifts that they made at school. Sooooo cute. Larry wouldn't let me do housework, even though I helped to laundry. We then went to visit some friends for the evening. I was missing my family yesterday. This visit was MUCH needed. I find when "special" holidays or days occur, I tend to get a little "homesick" I know that we are called to Smiths Falls and I LOVE this town and our church family. On these days I tend to get homesick. Reason is that most families in the church have family get together's, which they are allowed. However, due to the fact that our family lives so far away from us, we end up hanging with ourselves. Which I'm not complaining because I am blessed to have my family, don't get me wrong. I just really MISS our families on days like yesterday.

I am a blessed girl and am thankful for the life I have. Who would have thought that I'd be married to a Pastor. Who would have thought that I'd be a mother of 3 beauties. I am extremely blessed and want to shout out a THANK YOU to my father in Heaven.

Dear Alanna..
Maybe when I hit my goal. I'll have to do "the thing" that you waited 29 years for. I do remember my Marl lake adventures, but I don't think that I could do this today. However, if I hit my goal. I just possibly may. :)

Be blessed everyone

Thought of the day

"Life is too short to worry about the food we eat and the clothes we wear. Life is but a mist. Enjoy everyday like it is your last. Worry is overrated anyways"

Love you all

Kozlofhenhoff

I actually Ran Today

Hello World... I was thinking back to when I was in Grade 7 and 8. I used to Cross country run. Why can't I do this now? My walking buddy came today and has decided to "push" me past my comfort of just walking. The last 100 meters (I know not that far.. but for me was far enough), I jogged. It was great the first 50 meters but I began to feel horrible the last 50 meters. She kept pushing me, "you can do it Heidi, you can do it" I kept going, complaining, but kept going. Then we cheered when I completed the run. It felt good, and shameful that I was sooooo out of breath. I told her how embarrassed I was, yet excited that I could do this. I hope I can do 200 meters next time :)

We have been seeing signs all over the place that say "Where is Franktown?" This is an annual run 1km 5km or 10km run for the Christian School in this area. Our goal is to do the 5km run next year. I am confident that with learning how to "breath" while running, I WILL and CAN do this. I'm excited about this journey!!

This picture is a before shot. I put it on to remind me to keep going. I was .4lb up. I'm stuck on 231, but I know with lots of work, I WILL get below the 230 mark within days. I'm eating well and am excited b/c Dairy Queen has a "fudge" bar that has I believe 35 to 45 caleries. So when I'm craving ice cream, I now have a treat that I too can have. Just not every day or the whole box in one day!!!

Do want to know what I think is really amazing. I know that 2 of my followers are in this journey with me. I want you all to know that IF you are on this journey. WE CAN DO IT!!!


The thought of the day (which I don't do everyday.. I really should though) is a Verse that keeps going on in my head is "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 2 Timothy 4:7

Thanks

Heidi Kozlof

I am the Same

Hello World.

I'm hoping all is well with everyone. Yesterday was an uneventful day. We awoke early with our little P-boy (I bet he'll hate that nickname), I did my morning routine. I am the same, no weight loss. I've been up and down all week. My first little "rut". I'm sure this will pass.

Today I was down a little. I'm ALMOST at 5lbs. It's taken a while to get to the 5, but I'm OH so close.

I've been watching some of my friends on facebook, who seem to be in a journey themselves. They look fantastic. I almost didn't recognize the husband. It's so encouraging to see others in a journey like mine.

Bennet's teacher called today. He wasn't having a great morning. It was very discouraging. Bennet is having insomnia and can not fall asleep. He's not getting a good night sleep, which makes it hard for him to function. I pray that whatever is going on with him, that I have the guidance and wisdom on how to help him.

I have a little vent today. Every person is different from each other. We all have different personalities. It hurts me when people don't realize this. Some people are "shy", this doesn't make them a "snob" or "stuck up"- This makes them "shy". Let us not be so quick to judge others, let us be quick to "Get to know each other", then you may realize, that this person is actually an amazing person, who loves God and loves others.

There I feel better now.

Thanks for reading. Hope to have more time tonight. As soon as I get started, Preston starts a screaming.

Bye for now

Missed day and Missed morning

O.k, so I've missed one day.. I know.. I'm bad :( Where to begin...

Today is a special day in my life, today is the day I celebrate my anniversary with my dear hubby. We've been married 8 years today. I couldn't ask for a better husband, father and best friend. I hope he feels the same. I do have to admit that I may not have treated him with Love and Respect at 3:00am this fine morning. Preston wanted to feed, and then stay up. I wanted to feed him, then go to bed. These two actions, just don't work. I began feeling frustrated as my "AMAZING" husband was sleeping. Then I thought to myself,
"If I can't sleep, then he shouldn't either" I must admit, I was being very selfish at this point. I awoke him with an abrupt.. "WAKE UP" He was confused, and probably not amused all at the same time. He asked me if I wanted him to take Preston. Then I huffed and puffed and became very irritated because I didn't know what I wanted to do. I actually did want Larry to sleep, as I knew that it was an early morning for him, but I too wanted to sleep. What do I do? How do I answer? Was I pleasant? Not a chance. Does my husband Love me?? Yes and boy am I blessed. I ended up getting Preston back to sleep for a little bit. Then at 6:00am, Larry took him out to the living room. Preston didn't want Daddy, he wanted Mommy. I was a little bit calmer then before, and was able to cuddle with my little man. Poor Larry. What do I expect?? I think sometimes I can't make up my mind at what I want that it leaves Larry guessing. Then when he guess incorrectly, I'm upset. I don't get me!! He probably doesn't either. However, I do have to say, I am 100% blessed to have a man who Loves me, but Loves God even more. He's everything that I prayed for and more. I know I'm getting all "gushy" but honestly, "The best 8 years of my life" I can't wait to spend the next 50+ years with this man. I wonder if I'll still be grumpy at 65 or 70. "Larry, wake up you old man"!! I can just hear me. Larry if you're reading this "I love you so very much. Thank you for handling my grumpiness, thank you for loving me no matter what I look like, Thank you for making me feel beautiful. You are my best friend and I Really do treasure you. I hope you'll forgive me for my grumpiness at 3:00am this morning.. Love you"

O.k enough about Larry and our marriage. On to my journey. Well yesterday I was down .4lbs. I haven't weighed myself today. I will tomorrow morning. Food wise is well. I'm excited b/c the kiddo's are going to have "whole wheat Pasta and sauce" and Larry and I are having Spaghetti Squash and sauce. Great veggie and feels like we're having Pasta when we're not. I have had some "cookies" today. They were there and I didn't stop myself. Which I'm okay about,just as long as this doesn't become a constant habit. Life is great. I feel blessed. Thanks for walking with me on my journey.

Dedication Day!!!

Today was a special day for Preston and our family. We dedicated him to the Lord in front of my parents and sister and our church family. This is a special day for us as we make a pledge to teach our son in the ways of our faith. We love this tradition as it makes us accountable as parents.

We had a nice lunch with one of our teens that have moved away, and my family. I behaved too and had a "turkey wrap" and salad. I think I've done pretty well. I have had some ice cream this week-end. And I didn't weigh myself today. I am really hoping I won't be up tomorrow morning ;)

Not much to share today.. Just hanging with my family watching Alvin and the Chipmunks 2.

Be blessed

Kozlofhenhoff

Down!!

Well I awoke this morning in anticipation of getting on the WII and doing my body test. As I got on I closed my eyes and prayed, "please be down, please be down" and to my surprise I was back down to where I was before I gained the last 2 days. So I'm very very happy with the results. I was a little surprised though, because last night we had a "surprise" celebration with the youth, for 2 of our leaders who just had a baby boy. I decided I wouldn't Pass on the ice cream cake, b/c I would later "crave" it if I did. Diary Queen should be called DEVIL Queen!! LOL

Last night was a really neat night. Our youth group met at the church and did a photo scavenger hunt and then ended at our house to surprise the two new parents. It was a smaller group that showed up, but really neat to see them connect with the other leaders. One boy was in a head lock (play one) with one of our guy leaders. Just to see them bonding was extraordinary. I love how our youth leaders are passionate about the teens. I pray that this Love will rub off on them and they too will "pass it on". Yet as I was observing our youth, what a World we live in. Two of them were texting each other back and forth, while sitting beside each other.. WHAT IS THAT?? IT makes me laugh, and I just don't understand the concept. I guess I am getting older, I am creeping to the big 3-0.

The big 3-0. Wow in 5 months I will no longer be in my twenties, which I guess is why I really do want to get healthy. I remember when my Dad was 35 he had some "heart" issues and I just don't want to go down that road. My Dad is doing well now, but it still rings in my mind, what he and our family went through when he was rushed and stayed in the hospital. I remember that Dad didn't want us to visit him, because he was hooked up to monitors and all the equipment to keep him healthy. I remember Dad walking for hours afterwards, getting his heart back into shape. I remember this and realize that I am now entering the age bracket where he became ill. I MUST keep going, I MUST stay healthy for my self and my family!! I WILL do this and I'm glad you are all on my journey. It's great having some accountability. I just love it!!

Well I hope you have a blessed day. I know that I will. I'm just waiting for my parents and sister to arrive.

Kozlofenhoff (Heidi)

UP

Hi World,

Feeling better today. Wow what an off day I had yesterday. It was a very emotional ride. However, today is a new day.

I weighed myself today and was up again. I however am not discouraged because I do know that I had a late "pot luck" dinner, so that could be a part of it.

I however had a 30 minute walk, which was to be by myself, however my daughter asked if she could join me, and how could I say "no" when it seems like the two of us don't have many "mother daughter" moments, since my 4 month old entered the World. It was a wonderful moment for me. She is such a bright little girl, I have such admiration for my daughter. She loves EVERYONE, has such an amazing spirit and heart.

Mikayla wanted me to put on my blog that yesterday she had a "play date" after school with her miracle pal Morgan. Morgan is such a beautiful, wonderful girl who is an absolute Miracle. Her Mom just loves that Mikayla is sincerely Morgan's friend. I just love these girls friendship, and pray that Mikayla will ALWAYS be there for Morgan. Morgan and her Mom made this a "special" day for Mikayla. They made Kraft Dinner and Chicken nuggets for her. It was a special time for two special girls.

Today until Monday is going to be a busy time for the Kozlof's. We are having youth over for a special evening, then tomorrow my Parents and sister are arriving to help celebrate Prestons Dedication on Sunday. Saturday morning Larry and the teens are doing a car wash, to help support our teens that are heading to convention!!!

I am signing off to try and get some work done. My thought of the day was on my Mom's Facebook Status this morning

Thought of the day : "There is no such thing as a bad day-only bad moments in a good day"

Kozlofhenhoff

Yummy Snack Idea

Hey all. I just had a wonderful snack. I love Cottage cheese, grapes and some almonds. YUM!!! Pass it on..

Kozlofhenhoff

Emotions get the best of me

Hello World,

Today has been a very tearful day. I woke up and immediately knew that today wasn't going to be one of my more "happy days". Some days I find that no matter how hard you try to be cheerful, you just can't always be. I've learned that YES we must have joy. Wasn't that one of my "thoughts of the day"? However, today I just can't seem to find it. I know this isn't as "perky" as my other blogs. I am actually understanding that a few days ago I wrote that I feel like my depression is "lifting". Which I still speak to that, but isn't it ironic that as soon as I spoke that to my blogger friends.. BOOM, my feelings were hurt, and I just seem to be a "tiny" rut since then. I am sorry if this seems so "gloomy" but blogging is a great way to "release" what's going on inside.

I too was up 1lb today, but I'm not discouraged, it was bound to happen. I will continue to drink my water, eat as well as I can and walk. I'm actually going for a walk. BY MYSELF- no children or hubby ;) tonight. We are heading to our small group for a pot luck.. (must watch myself there) and I'm feeding Preston then heading there by foot, while my AMAZING (have I bragged on him lately?) husband is going to head there by car with food and kiddo's. I'm looking forward to it!! It's about a 20-30 minute walk, just me and God. LOVE LOVE LOVE those times. It's about the same distance as my trek to Zellers. Hope it goes a little easier then last week. I'm convinced that it will.

I've tried to do some more garden work. As soon as I go outside Preston wakes up and wants to be entertained. I was almost irritated this morning that he wouldn't let me pull weeds. However, I snapped out of it quickly, when I realized this precious bundle just wanted to be cuddled. I need to take every moment with Preston as if it was our last. He's a gift from God that I treasure.

My hubby has an awesome Blog started. I hope you'll follow his blog too. I am really proud of the gift of writing that Larry has, so I'm wanting you to take a look at it. He's such an awesome guy. I do feel blessed to have him in my life. He's totally handling my tears today in such dignity and respect. He could totally fluff me off or tell me to "grow up" but he doesn't, he justs loves.

Thanks for your support, I totally Love this blogging thing.

Be blessed

Kozlofhenhoff (aka-Heidi)

Flower beds are taking over the World

My flower gardens are CRAZY. When we bought our beautiful home 2 years ago, we purchased it in the Winter. We had no idea what was under all the snow. Last year I paid a lady to come and help get my gardens under control, they looked fantastic. Now it's spring and all the darn annuals have peaked their way into my gardens and again the overwelming task is a head of me. I am not going to pay someone again, when it ends up looking the same come spring.

Today I'm going to try and work HARD on the garden. Hopefully Preston will work with me. I have no green thumb what so ever, so we'll have to wait and see what today brings.

I weighed myself this morning and I was down another .2 pounds. I am excited at my progress and know that I wouldn't be doing this without my father in heaven.

Last night I was HUNGRY and didn't know what I should do. So I ate fruit. I think that's amazing because normally I'd want chips or something salty.. I don't want to "toot" my horn, but I really am proud of myself. I am not getting a big head, because I know that I will have my up's and downs. I am just really motivated, and I don't remember feeling like this since before my wedding. That was when I was at my best. :)

To those that may be struggling. Keep going.. Make a tiny goals, like mine right now are 5lb increments and my first long term is to get under 200lbs. My Mom has given me a reward for my weight loss goal. Once I hit 199lbs, she is going to buy me an new outfit!!! How cool is that. I have a pretty amazing Mom! I think once I hit 175lbs, I have to check that out with my Mom again, Mom if you're reading try and post a comment on this if I'm right or wrong, she is going to pay for Larry and myself to take a week-end away. I can't WAIT to get there. See, I have short goals. Then long term goals too.

I find that doing steps and walking isn't a "chore" it's a fitness "holiday" to me. I enjoy this very much and it doesn't seem like "work" to me.

Thought of the day- "The Joy of the Lord Is Your Strength"

My 4 year old is so cute

Today was a weird day. I went to Baby Buddies, and then JUST after blogging that my depression was disappearing, I had a wave of it this afternoon. Not sure why? The sensation of anxiety is not a fun place to be. When this wave started, I began to do steps, 30 minutes to be exact. Then it subsided.

While doing my 30 minutes of steps, I was able to put Preston in his chair, and he looked at me and giggled. I felt like God had allowed him to be my "cheerleader". I just love my gifts from God. I am truly enjoying my Wii Fit. I am looking forward to my girlfriend coming home from Florida. She's my walking buddy. I can't wait to not have to walk by myself.

Anyways signing off, I don't have much to say this evening..

Kozlofenhoff

It's almost May and it's Snowing

Well my morning started off a little early with Preston. Then low and behold I look out my window and see snow. My heart sank, because just yesterday I was enjoying a wonderful walk in 20 degree weather with my hubby, Bennet and Preston, while Mikayla was in school. While on our 30 minute walk, Bennet looked up at me and said, "I LOVE SPRING". "Me too Bennet, Me too". As I awoke this morning, my head hurting a little, I pouted! I'm keeping B-boy home today, I know that he'll be devastated at the sight of snow and his play structure/sand area will be closed for the day, thus putting him in a downward spiral. I am taking him to my small group, "Baby buddies" and hopefully he'll have some friends to play with today.

Yesterday, Mikayla came home from school. One of her friends had told her that her Mom was fat. This, REALLY upset her. I was taken back for a moment. I really feel like the enemy wants me to feel "down" about myself. Mikayla then proceeded to say, "I gave her a dirty look" she didn't like that look. "Mom, I told her that you're beautiful". I gave Mikayla a hug and thanked her, but deep down was mortified. My poor girl. We told her that it's never nice to call people fat. Yes, I'm overweight, but that is why I want to take care of myself now, get healthy. My girl has a wonderful heart. I thank God everyday for her, even when she's acting like a 16 year old.

The good news is I'm down another .7lbs. Which is a total of 4lbs in 1 week. I'm very excited about this!! Eating healthy and working out has brought me out of a little depression and has given me a new "joy" that I can't describe. I really feel closer to God in this process, because I'm taking care of the "temple" of the Holy Spirit. I want to do this for my health and for my family. I want to share in this experience, hoping that if I can inspire just 1 other person to get healthy, that would be amazing!

There is a person in my life who has inspired me. I love it.. She has no idea how much she has impacted my life. I thank God for her. And pray a blessing over her life. I keep thinking.. IF she can do it.. So can I.

I hope that I will be in touch this evening to let you know how things are going. Thanks for reading and supporting me. I love you all

Thought of the day: You are beautifully and wonderfully made.

Kozlofhenhoff

Yesterday to the start of today

Great day yesterday. Good eating, amazing time of worship at church last night. My trip to church "both" times were without incident. Bennet after his melt down, with the help of his sister, went down to the car with no yelling or screaming. It was a wonderful day.

Mikayla, my little mother hen. She's a wonderful help. I don't think I could do Sunday mornings without her. If Preston needs a feed, she's helping me get Bennet ready. She's amazing and I love her to bits. Sometimes she thinks she's 16, but I love the challenge ;) My Mom says "she's you".

Today, I'm going to open up to you about our son Bennet. He's a beautiful little man, VERY bright, he can count to 100 and totally Loves numbers. His Kindergarten teacher has said he's very advanced for his age, thus making me very proud. Since Bennet was little I had noticed a few things. He didn't start really talking or formulating thoughts until he was 3 1/2, we thought that he was just a "shy" little guy, he took a VERY long time to potty train, he doesn't look at anyone in the eye, he sometimes seems like he's "ignoring" people, but can hear everything that is being said, he hates loud noises, and is OBSESSED with Thomas the train, not like a regular love of Thomas, he's OBSESSED, that is almost what he talks about constantly. He also does not handle "transition" at all. At first we didn't really think about his behaviour as being an issue. UNTIL he started school. Bennet, our sweet little man, was struggling with the new change. His teacher is AMAZING and we love her to bits, but she too saw this incredible little man struggling and we worked together on a few things.. Then Preston was born, and due to this "CHANGE" and "Winter" (Bennet HATES winter, to cold) He continued to struggle, if not was worse then September. Bennet doesn't "play" with kids, he plays by himself. He will play with his sister, and Jude- but they are his comfort level.. Back to Winter. Bennet LOVES (hope you don't mind my capitals, it's how I express the word) sand and the sandbox- the "play structure" was closed for winter and this totally disappointed our wee man, and made him very unhappy. At recess time he would make his teachers life interesting and would fight about getting ready for outside time. His teacher ended up calling us and we made a plan to pick him up for lunch recess (because he would end up walking in circles on the pavement anyways, by himself) and have lunch with him and then take him back, this made life so much easier for him and his teacher. I hope this is making sense. My point to all of this is, that we are trying to get him assesed, but had hit a road block, I contacted our Health unit and they are helping me start the process of a refferal. I spoke to the one lady today, who reviewed Bennets Questionnaires, and she does feel that his social development does need to be "assessed" which is not a huge surprise to us. No matter what the end result of this process, Bennet is Bennet and we will not use this as an excuse to poor behaviour, we just want to know if somethings up. I am asking for your prayers as we continue this process. Asking for guidance for Larry and myself. Asking that my doctor will have an open mind. When I first approached her about Bennet, she laughed and said "he's just a boy" and I was shocked and said NOTHING. That's why I went through the "health unit" as they will be my liaison.

I was down .7lbs today.. Hey that's better then being up.

Thanks for your prayers. I appreciate you all

Kozlofenhoff

Good Morning

Hello to everyone. I weighed myself today and am down 1.8lbs.. Whoo hoo. I have done my 30 minutes of steps and am wanting to do some walking with the kiddo's today. It's beautiful outside today. Breakfast was a yummy 100% whole wheat english muffin with tomato and a slice of cheese and Banana. I'm needing to get more water intake. I honestly feel fantastic today. I feel bubbly, even with a crying 4 year old.

It's Sunday morning.. We're heading out to church soon. Bennet is already having his Sunday morning melt down. It never fails. Sunday mornings I feel like a crazy women . Larry heads to work at 9:00 and I get the kiddo's ready for church. Once 1030 hits I'm glad to be at church in 1 piece. I am trying to change up Sunday mornings, because the kiddo's can sometimes see a side of me that I hate. Then I walk into church with all smiles on, "Hi how are you?" "Wonderful" (Ya right, I just screamed at my kiddo's to hurry the heck up) I don't want to be a "fake" in the eyes of my babes. Today I'm letting Bennet have his cry and then I will "gently" help him get ready and Go. He's funny because I think he's expecting a reaction out of me.

Well I will probably write later on. I lead worship this evening, a passion of mine. Kind of nervous, since I haven't done this in a while. Remind me to post about how my weight affects me during worship. I just don't have the time now.

Signing off. Have a BLESSED Sunday.. I'm sure we will too

Kozlofenhoff

Birthday Party

Well Today has been a pretty good day. I was up 1/2 pound, which I'm not discouraged, happy it wasn't a full pound. I had a banana for breakfast, I know that it's not much, but I'm not a breakfast girl. Then for lunch a wonderful salad with some almonds in it and dinner I made a healthy chili. I am very proud to say that Bennet was invited to a classmates birthday party. (His first one besides our Senior Pastors son) It was soooo nice to have HIM invited. It was a swimming party. So I decided to not worry about what I may possibly look like in a swimsuit, and I had a FANTASTIC time of swimming with Bennet boy. It was a great moment to have with him. Mikayla has been in swimming lessons for the past week and a bit with her school, and she put her life jacket on and swam all by herself. Preston stayed with Daddy and watched the kiddo's swim.. It was a great "ACTIVE" afternoon. Then there was cake. I didn't even want any.. It was really exciting. I just had a few veggie sticks. I was and am PROUD of myself.

Here's the kicker.. DQ is STILL calling my name. I'm trying to think about the "3 bite" rule, but I'm a tad fearful that I may not S-T-O-P. I even went on their nutritional guide to see about Calories and was HORRIFIED! Still, the wonderful ice cream shop is calling the Kozlof's name. I guess I'll have to wait to see the end result. I guess I could go for an extra few "laps" around our Park's walkway, but I don't think for me that is the point.

On a totally different note: We are getting some organization done in our home. Our kitchen renos are "almost" complete and we finally picked up a new "computer desk" that shuts closed. I LOVE it!! The kid's toy room will now have TONS of space, since we're moving our computer. I look forward to the time when we do our flooring this summer. My Dad is going to come spend time with Larry this summer putting the floor down. While they're doing that, I'm getting the heck out of my house!!!

I'm off for now.. I'll keep you updated with my process

Kozlofenhoff

First Temptation

Media and it's pull. I've been doing well today, not too tempted to over eat. HOWEVER, we were out and about this afternoon when Low a behold an advertisement came on the radio. I know better then to listen, my English media class that I LOVED in high school taught me this. My ears couldn't seem to pull away from the Ad. Dairy Queen is having an anniversary. Buy 1 blizzard get the 2nd one for 25 cents. WHAT A DEAL!!!! Forget it Kozlof!!! You want to get healthy, you want to teach your children "good habits". Can't do this!!

So here I am typing my inner battle at this moment. I have decided NOT to go.. I am chewing a piece of gum and hoping that this desire to go to DQ will pass. I'm sure it will.

It's funny but I never thought I'd be "telling all" the struggles that are within, however I believe that THIS is the start of something BIG!!! I'm pumped and excited to take this journey. Let's just hope that DQ will stop calling my name.. DQ is the DEVIL!!! LOL.. Well maybe not the Devil, but in my case it is. And I've only been on this journey for 2 days. I can't imagine what Jesus went through on his 40 day fast and was tempted..

Signing off.. Not sure for how long.. But Baby Preston is awake and Screaming for me to get off the computer.

Thanks for reading

Kozlofenhoff

Great Day

So I'm back from a walk. I think I may have pushed myself a little harder then I should have. I decided that I would take Preston for a walk to Zellers, which is about 1km away from my home. Remember I had JUST done 30 minutes of steps. I started off strong, smelling the fresh air and spring flowers around. I thought I was doing GREAT!! I must have been 5 minutes into our walk, when I started to feel my legs cramp up. "I think I can" was chanting in my head, also "What was I thinking?" I kept going. I got to the point that I was 1/2 way there, and picked up my pace. I was sweating and could feel my heart pumping.. I was hoping that no one could see how HARD I was breathing. Sweat pouring down my face, I kept going.. I finally made it to Zellers. Thank GOD!!!

After getting a bag of diapers for Preston, I decided that I was NOT walking back and headed to Larry's church, just beside the mall. I knocked on the door and Larry looked at me in a strange way. I was never so relived to see him. I looked at my handsome man and said. "I pushed too hard". He gave me a smirk and asked if I'd like a ride home.

I'm so blessed to have Larry. He never made me feel dumb or stupid. He's my biggest fan, and I'm his. Our 8th year anniversary is coming up, and I feel sooooooooo blessed. He's amazing and I don't think I tell him enough. He handles my mood swings, my hormonal outbursts, and my craziness. No one could handle me like him. He's a great father, wonderful husband and fantastic man of God.

So there we go.. I'm feeling great today!!! I hope you are all feeling great too!!

Thought for the day..

Nothing is impossible.

Be blessed

Kozlofenhoff!!!

Day 1 1/2 to 2

So yesterday I think I did pretty good. Did have some cookies though :( I weighed myself this morning and I was down 21/2 pounds. Whoo-hoo!!

I've done 30 minutes of free step on the Wii fit and am heading out for a walk with my little guy. I truly feel good about this. I'm just hoping I don't get bored and "eat". I love to eat when I bored.

Well I'll probably be on again this afternoon. My little man is "screaming" for my attention.

Sign off for now.

Be blessed. I wonder if anyone is actually reading this??

Kozlofenhoff!!!

Wow!!

SO it's been way over a year since I first wrote. From my last post, you've probably figured out that I've had a baby!! We now have 3 beautiful children. God has been sooooooo Good. Blessings they are!!! Just a fast update!!!

Kozlofenhoff

Time for a change

I know I am a horrible blogger. I'm also horrible at being healthy. I am teaching my Three babies that it's okay to eat what ever they want. Well today I'm telling the whole world that TODAY I must change.

I'm a believer and I believe that at this point, I'm not being a good steward to my body. I want to be around for a very long time. But at a weight of 234 pounds. It's just not going to happen

So here I go.

Dear World,

I want to be a healthy eater. I want to change my ways. I'm starting with a few goals at hand. I would like to get under 200lbs within the next 21/2 to 3 months. My ultimate goal is to lose 74lbs. I know that I can do this. I want to drink more water, eat less and excersize at least 30 minutes a day. (This is going to be a huge task)

Today I shout out to everyone that I'm tossing the temptations out.. Locking the cookies (my hubby needs them in case of low blood sugars) AND showing my beautiful babies that life is too important. Lets get healthy!!! I think I will do a meal plan and STICK to it!!

I wish this would be an easy task. It scares me though. I've failed before.. However, I will not set myself up to lose. Nothing is impossible and I know this.

My prayer is that my "enablers" will not enable.. That I will have people cheering me on and supporting me.

My friend said to me today. Don't deny yourself. Have 3 bites only. B/c the 4th and 5th would taste the same anyways.. LOL I LOVE that!!!

I don't have Dr Phil to help me and I can't go on the Biggest Loser. I have a father in heaven and myself.

Here I go Day 1 on this journey.. Can I do it!! YES I CAN!!

Heidi Kozlof