New website

Hey all. I haven't stopped writing.. I have found this amazing new love OF writing. However, it will not be here anymore

check out www.designedbycreativity.com Larry and I have started a new website with a passion for our writing but also a Passion to lift up fellow bloggers and see their gifts and talents appreciated and noticed!!!

Check it out.. Sign up to be apart of it!!

We know that this is something NEW for us!!! However we feel that this is something that God is also calling us to do. Share our hearts, open and transparent and see what he can do!!

Thanks all

Heidi

My Wake up call- Call to Action

I believe that I am a pretty loving, caring person, and one thing that God has been stretching and growing in me is the Grace that I have for others, in all realms of life. May it be at work, and home, at the grocery store, or even while I am driving on the roads. What about the Grace for those that step in our churches??

I realized that I am a little naive, or in denial when it comes to how people actually feel about the church. When I started going to church, the one thing I felt was acceptance and love. I was a 15 year old girl, who was desperately seeking relationships and love, I wasn't getting that from my school. When asked to come to youth with a friend from my choir, I jumped at the chance of going out on a "Friday night". I found what I was desiring for at my youth group, I was loved and was acceppted just the way I was. (A very Fuzzy permed haired, tad over weight, 15 year old girl) and because of that, I found Christ and my life was changed forever.

However, when I see some conversations on the World Wide Web going around about the "church", it's not this beautiful depiction that I have. A friend on Facebook had posted that she was in search of a new church. She didn't want to go by herself though. She had many responses but one response actually RIPPED my heart out of my chest. It said

"Hi Friend, I have stopped because I can't seem to find one that welcomes me with open arms they all look at me like im some sort of diseased being something.. I would be willing to check one out with you maybe"

A diseased being, not just one church but MANY churches were making her feel this way. This needs to be our wake up call. If we truly know the Grace of God, then all of our judgments and hazy glares and predispostioned thoughts should be no more. Everyone is covered by the Grace and love of the Cross, EVERYONE. Who are we to judge, who are we to think that we are better then anyone. WE were created for great purpose and an amazing plan. All of us. Not one person is out of reach from his Love.

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling (1 Peter 4:8-9).”

It's time church that we take a stand and be Grace givers and not Grace destroyers. Grace to the single Momma who is with child again,and just wants to know that she is cared for and loved, Grace to the Pastor's Wife, who struggles with self confidence and self image, Grace to the out of control child, who is living with Foster parents because their parents would rather do drugs then care for them, dare I say Grace to the Pastor, who's human and makes mistakes too. Grace to the broken, Grace to the needy, Grace to the sick and the healthy, Grace to all, to everyone that you may come into contact with. No one should feel like we are looking at them with some sort of disease. OUr arms SHOULD be wide open and ready to Love on them forever and ever. Yes Forever!!!

I write here today to "apologize" to those who have felt like the young women on Facebook. You are absolutely amazing and I see God's amazing Grace all over you, I see amazing potential, I see Greatness and such a Destiny all over your life. You matter to me and I will always be in your corner Cheering you on.

I type here today with my heart on my sleeves and ask you to remember what your faith is all about. It' time that we become World changers. It takes ONE person to start a flood of revival. Our faith is about the Grace of Jesus on that cross saving us from all of our sins, and rising from the tomb because he is God!! This was for all of us.

Thanks

Heidi Kozlof

In a plateau

Hello everyone. After realizing it's been a while I thought I would get back to this blogging

I'm still at 220lbs. That's 15lbs since January. I have been between 220-218 for the last few weeks.
It is almost the end of my competition and another lady has completly been kicking my butt. I am almost embarrassed NOT to win, but know that the last month I haven't been working so hard. This lady has been faithful and deserves to win her prize!

I am in a bit of a "rut" I don't want to run, I don't want to excersize and I want to eat Ketchup chips.. LOL I do however want to keep losing and get healthy, so I must continue and keep moving and eating better.

I see others losing the weight and getting healthy and almost "envy" them. (So not Christian of me.. lol)

I am struggling because I always seem to start strong, then dwindle off- Then have to start ALL OVER!! Why oh why do I do this to myself. I almost set myself up for "failure".

Anyways, I will keep you posted on how things are going.

I am doing the relay for life next week, feel really inspired to celebrate those that I have lost to the ugly disease of cancer and celebrate the survivors. This will be a very active a FUN event. Looking forward to it!!!

Heidi

Been a While

Hey all..

I have been some what absent from the blogging in the last little while. I do apologize.

Things are going well. I haven't been working out as much as I should, and I'm sure it will show when I do my weigh in. I was down another 2lbs but that was at my home scales not the scales at Vickie's. That's a total of 17.8lbs. I am very proud.

With that being said, I really am struggling with all the Easter chocolate and eggs lying around. I won't lie, this hasn't been the best week of eating or self control. I even indulged in a bag of chips. I did feel guilty right after eating the bag(I did share with others). I find it interesting at the guilt. I honestly feel terrible after eating "junk" like that. WHY do I do that?? I CRAVE all night to the point where I can't get my mind off of those RED, amazing tasting chips. Then after I eat them, I feel completely yucky and bloated and know that I really can't complain, since I knew it wasn't the best thing for me. Ketchup Chips are my weakness. Just a few posts ago I even said "I CAN'T eat them again- It's an addiction.. It really is. The only person to blame is me. I really want to make everyone proud, I want to eat healthy, I want to run a 5K. I have these ambitions, and I won't give up on them. I just fall into old habits, really really quickly. I know this sounds negative and it's not. It's just me processing this incredibly FUN, yet difficult journey.

Okay- I will tell you where my little bump on the road started (This is not a Poor me moment, this is me being completely honest). A year ago I made a goal to run the 5K next week-end in Frankville with a very close friend of mine. I have worked on this running thing, and I do enjoy it very much. However, with so much sickness in my home since Christmas, there has been a MAJOR decrease in training and I tried a run last week and came to the realization that I'm only doing about 2.5Km's(if that) and I am not at the point where I can continue. I am NOT ready for a 5KM run next week, and I guess I'm disappointed in myself. That being said, I wouldn't call this a Failure, because who would have thought that I'd ever beable to run as much as I am a year ago??? Not I!!! Therefore, it's not a fail, it's a "I'm not ready". I am so proud of my girlfriend as she is going to do this Run next week-end. I wish I was joining her, but I am at the point where I know that I'm just not ready. And I know that THAT is okay.

I still have a goal to do a 5K I just have to figure out that once I"m ready. I am ready :)

I hope this isn't too depressing. It's not meant to be. I'm still journey on this weight loss/healthy eating. People ARE starting to notice, which isn't why I'm doing it, but MAN does it feel great to hear "Wow you're looking great?" or "ARe you losing weight" YES YES I am Thank you for noticing.

Anyhoo. I will be in touch to let you know how I'm doing.

Love you all

Heidi

Terrible blogger but doing very well

Hey World.. It's been a LONG time.

One of my favorite verses is "I can do all things through Christ Jesus who gives me strength"

This Verse has been my life verse for the last several months. I have been working VERY hard on this healthy, lose weight journey of mine. I really started about a year ago, but REALLY started in January(if I was totally honest). I entered the Biggest Winner contest at Vicki's and have been determined to Win. I am NOT in the lead at the moment, but I still feel like a winner. I'm getting weighed this afternoon, and I believe I should be down another 2lbs, which would put me down 15lbs since January. (Less the when Preston was born and this would put me at 220lbs-almost under the 220's sooooooooo excited) I am beyond proud. I know that this journey is FAR from over, but I know that GOD has given me the strength to continue. Yes in this time, I haven't ate very well on certain days, but I get back on the wagon, and I work out HARD!!!

I am not doing this to be noticed or given attention. I am doing this for my family, for my body, to get healthy and STAY healthy!!! HOWEVER, Sunday a few people commented on my loss' and I was overwhelmed and STINKEN excited. If people are noticing, then I must be losing this weight, and I know that I am getting active and healthy. I want to be around for my Babies graduations, weddings, Grand babies. The way I was going/growing, mostly likely it wasn't going to happen!! I knew this and it frightened me

I am continuing my running. I had a break with Winter and sickness, so this week I decided to get back on the wagon with this. I am determined to do the 5K run in May. I have said this since I started this journey. I WILL do this. Even if I'm the last at the finish line, I don't care, I want to prove to myself that I am capable of this run. Please pray for me, I have been fighting a chest cold, that has stressed my lungs out and making it VERY difficult to breathe right while running. However.. GOD IS MY STRENGTH when I'm weak.. I WILL do this.. I HAVE to. God is my HEALER too.

I'm also excited to be doing the "Relay for life" with a team called the "Pink Rockets" My friend Linda was diagnosed with Breast cancer on her 29th Birthday. I want to support her with this and celebrate that she is now in "remission" and can't wait for this night. I haven't done an all nighter in Years, but I'm excited to join this event and help fight this horrific disease. (So if any of you can support me by pledging my team, I'd appreciate it!!)

God has given me this life, I need to embrace every moment with a new exciting attitude. There are days when I feel down, but I'm finding that doing a Run or an aerobic DVD really does help the emotions. It's a GREAT stress relief. It really is!!!

I feel blessed to have 3 Healthy amazing kiddo's. We have our challenges, but I know that God has never given me something I can't handle.

Preston is walking, which keeps me hopping- Bennet is doing really well. We are already focusing on getting him prepared for Grade 1 next year. Mikayla is doing well, she has some issue's focusing and keeping on task, but she has such an amazing heart. She makes me so proud. (They all make me proud) I'm not sure if I put this in another blog, however I am so proud that I will continue to write this. Mikayla was on the playground and saw a Peer of hers become angry and started swinging. She saw that he was heading for a tiny Kindergartener, so she step in front of this "wee" one and took this guys HIT!! HOW amazing is that for a 7 year old to take a hit, to protect someone smaller then her. WHAT a heart. I pray that I can be the Mommy that God wants me to be for her. To teach her and guide her to his path for her life. She's an amazing little girl, and I am blessed to call her my daughter. I am blessed blessed blessed!!!!!

I will let you all know how Today goes after my weigh in. I'm thinking I'm down 2, but we will have to wait and see!

Thank you all for being such a great support. I am so thankful that God has placed you all in my life.

If I can do this.. I know that anyone can!!

Love and Blessings

Heidi

O.K. After much thought I decided to put up some pictures. It gives me an incentive to keep going. I am almost at a 10lb loss and am very proud and excited.

I was looking for some pictures of me before Christmas. Could only find 1 and it's only 1/2 of me. I realized that I have been shying away from the camera for some time. I guess a little "self conscious" of what the picture will look like.

So Today I took a shot of me before leaving for work. As you can tell I still have some work. The neat thing about this picture of me in the M&M's shirt is that when I received it, it REALLY didn't fit me. I was so embarrassed but knew this was the shirt I had to wear. Today, it's still a little snug.. But I can wear it and see that YES my hard work is working

Thanks for your support.

Can't wait for my next weigh in

Heidi

Having a Craving..

Hey there everyone

Did my weekly weigh in and am very pleased. I am down another pound. I need to lose 1.8lbs and will hit a 10 pound weight loss. I am so excited and am finding a little bit of exercise and LESS calories goes a LONG WAY...

For myself this last few weeks has been a JOY!!! I know that sounds crazy but it's true. I've decided that No matter what the outcome, it's time to get healthy. The weight loss is just the bonus

I normally despise any form of exercise but NOT anymore. I have started a program called off the Couch to 5K. This is a running program that starts with 60 seconds running /walking. It's a 9 week program 3 times a week and surprising Works, IF you keep going, even when it gets tough.

When I'm not running. I'm walking for at least 30-45 minutes at least 4-5 times a week. I go to the Arena, or the highschool OR I have Walk the pounds away DVD's.

I also am eating less Calories. The way I am counting them is with a program that I use Online and IF you have an ipod, it's a FREE application you can use http://www.myfitnesspal.com/ It's really been a great help! If you decide to use it, you can add friends on it (kinda like a facebook for weight loss.. Feel free to add me,)

I am finding that if you enjoy yourself and BELIEVE in yourself. Set yourself up for success not failure. You can do it !!!! Don't be discouraged. You CAN do this!!!

Now I am having a little struggle. I want want want Ketchup chips. I've tried in the past the "rice crackers" but it is not taking away the "urge". I am PRAYING big time b/c I know that I WILL eat the whole bag. I just love them.. I can't just have "3" I know myself, so I am REALLY fighting an inner battle. I WANT to lose the weight and I want to WIN the competition. BUT I know if I eat that darn bag of chips, it could bring me back to square 1. It's like alcoholism, you can't just have 1 drink after getting sober. I can't just have 1 bag of chips. It's an addiction, and I need to BEAT it!! I WILL beat it. I just came to the revelation that if I want to get healthy, I can't go back to the chips. Wow!! what an interesting thought. I can do this!

Thanks for being my cheer leader. Please pray for me that I will continue to have a desire to work out.

Be blessed
Heidi

A Bible Verse and an update

Hey all.

Today I went in for my regular weigh in at Vickie's for my "Biggest Winner" competition. Can I just tell you that I was a little frightened, I know that I've been working out WAY more then the past. I know that I've REALLY been watching my Calorie intake too. Less food more exercise, and yet I was scared and thought that I probably GAINED. A voice in my head, (who was NOT God) was telling me that I was failing and a failure.

Well Guess what DEVIL.. I can do ALL things through Christ that Strengthens me. (This is my "signature" on my e-mail) and yet I forgot this verse until today!

I watched the scale and waited until the Zero's stopped. One foot then the next. Still a little worried, BUT when I saw the number at 227, I just about FREAKED right out. Having 2 other ladies screaming for me was also pretty exciting too. Ladies and gentleman, that puts me down 7.8lbs since January! I am so happy and thankful to my Father in Heaven. I know that he is proud of me. Just maybe I am proud of me too. Not too proud that I'm getting a BIG head, but PROUD that I CAN do this and WILL do this. I started this blog last April and it took me almost 10 months to really start seeing some progress. I am really pumped today and HOPE that I can continue this journey.

I am not writing this to be congratulated or cheered on. I am writing this to encourage everyone that IF you put your mind to it, you can DO this.

January I felt God really challenging me that my weight problem wasn't because I had 3 babies. My weight issues were ME and what I was putting into my body. Therefore, Today I am confessing that I am a bored eater an "emotional" eater and a "stress" Eater. BUT I want to be an example to my Generation and younger generations. I want to live for Christ and I REALLY feel that the way I eat is a bondage that Christ will set me free from. Today I am proclaiming to the World that I WILL be free from this. It won't be easy, and there are always "bumps" on this road. Today is a New Day and I hope you will continue on this ever so fun journey with me.

I really appreciate all of you. I find that having this blog allows me to be accountable to ALL of you. If any of you need prayer or just a little encouragement, send me a message. I'd LOVE to be there for ya!!! Having Vickie's Specialty shop Cheer me on, PROVES to me that there is POWER in accountability.

God Bless

Heidi

Down and excited..

Hey World. So this has been a very interesting week. I haven't been able to run for a week due to time restraints and my baby being ill. However, I have done some work out video's and really downsized my portions. With this routine and drinking my water......

I was down 6.2lbs from last week. I was shocked and excited. Hoping I can keep this streak going. If I do, I WILL be the Biggest Winner in the contest. I am REALLY hoping for this. $100.00 gift card for new clothes is SUCH an incentive.

I totally miss my running buddy and will be calling her this week. It's sooooo important to me that I get to the 5K ASAP.

My co-workers asked if I was losing weight. That was MUSIC to my ears. I hope I can keep it up.


thanks for sharing my excitement with me. I am doing this journey for me, but because I know that you are cheering me on. I WILL not QUIT. I picked up a key chain from Vickie's Specialty shop that say's "Do not Quit Do Not Quit DO NOT QUIT"
I am making a promise to myself. I WILL NOT QUIT I WILL NOT QUIT I WILL NOT QUIT

Be blessed
Heidi

Still running and joining the "Biggest Winner" Competition

Hey there World

SO I'm still running. We had taken a break for a while, but on Monday did week 4 day 1. It was incredible. 2- 5 minute runs and 2- 3 minute runs. I was really scared about the 5 minute run. BUT.... We did it! It was tough, but we did it. I was so proud!!! I look forward to running again tomorrow too! It will be a challenge, but I know it's about 2 1/2 times around the top of the Arena.

The new BEAUTIFUL arena in Sensational Smiths Falls has a Walking area at the top of the seated areas. I wasn't sure if I would be comfortable running there, but Courtney and I did it and it wasn't that bad. A little "loud" from a Bears Practice going on, but I'm happy we have a place to run. Much easier running there then on the snow.

Also excited because I'm joining a competition at Vickie's Specialty shop, one of my favorite stores here in town. It's called Biggest Winner (aka-weight loss) from Now til June, I will Simply weigh in once a week at Vickie's and collect my prizes! They are offering gift cards for EVERYONE who loses 5,10, and 20lbs and then a $25 gift card for EVERYONE who keeps their weight off all year! The person who loses the most by June 15th, will win a $100 gift card! That is my goal, the $100.00 gift card!!!! I will need new clothes, don't you think??? I can't wait!! A little more incentive to get healthy and LOSE the weight!!! Whoo-hoo to awesome ideas!

Well this is what's "new" now. Can't wait to write more and tell you all about my journey.

Heidi

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!

Welcome 2011. I'm not going to make any resolutions on "eating healthy or losing weight" due to the fact that I've been at this journey since last April. I can say that I am working on it. It's a "SLOW" process due to my LOVE of eating.. HOWEVER that being said...

I am still running. I took a 2 week break due to sickness and Christmas festivities and helping out at the M&M Meatshops. I missed running.. I missed it ALOT (which surprises me, since I HATE Physical Anything... lol)

After church today I decided it's time to get back at it. I repeated week 3 day 3 of couch to 5K , just to get myself ready for week 4. I am unbelievably proud of myself, because I did it without my running buddy! I missed not having her there, but to prove to myself that I can do this on my own was SUCH an achievement. With this run into Today we can proceed on Tuesday as we run together again for Week 4 day 1. I can't wait! A tad nervous since there is More running then walking, but I know that we CAN do this. We also found out that we can run in the upstairs of the arena. This makes me very very happy. Bad weather WILL NOT hold us back. It's so exciting to me that I will actually complete this program (even if I'm a little behind)

Thanks to many of you that have encouraged me through this journey. I look forward to 2011 to see what God has in store for us.

Be blessed, YOu can do anything that you set your mind too.

Love
Heidi Kozlof